


Disappear

by RestARose13



Category: Dragon Age, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-04
Updated: 2015-02-04
Packaged: 2018-03-10 12:38:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3290612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RestARose13/pseuds/RestARose13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Solas hears news about the Inquisitor and contemplates what it could mean.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Disappear

"Did you hear?"

"Hear what?"

"The Inquisitor! She’s gone!”

Solas stops dead in his tracks. For months he had been avoiding populated areas; the fewer people that have seen him, the better. He knows the Nightingale… no, Divine Victoria, has eyes and ears everywhere and did not doubt at least some would be looking for him after his disappearance. However, this was the last settlement before he entered the Tirashan and there were some supplies he would need. He had thought it far enough that no word would spread of him; he apparently was not far enough that word could not reach him, however.

Solas positioned himself within the shop’s shadow. Far enough to not draw suspicion, close enough to hear more of the conversation. If something had happened to the Inquisitor now, after everything…

"Well, she left! Stepped down or something."

"That should hardly be surprising. The Rifts are gone. That… Whatever it was… magister-darkspawn-thing… is dead. The south is stable. Honestly, the Inquisition was starting to wear out it’s welcome were you to ask me."

Solas released the breath he had been withholding. She was safe then. Still the news surprised him. From when they had spoken before, he thought she had planned to use the power and influence she had gained to further change the world. 

"What if you wake up to find that the future you shaped is worse than what was?"

"Then I’ll find out what went wrong and change it again."

She had said it so easily. Something goes wrong, you fix it. He doubted she had thought of a situation on the scale of what he had to do, still it had been a relief to hear her say that. It had also been what influenced him to take her to the glen, to finally tell her. Tell her who he was, what he had done, what he plans to do. You make a mistake, you fix it. He did not have to be alone. Together, they could fix it. Save their people. Give them what they always deserved.

But no.

He could not. When he looked at her, he realized how selfish he was being. How could he expect her to just accept everything? “I am the Dread Wolf. I locked away the gods, caused the fall of our people. I want to undo it, fix everything. Help me. Be with me. Please, don’t let me be alone.” Even if she could accept his true self, how could he ask her to atone for his mistake? How often had he seen her risk her life to atone for this latest one? Those first few days in Haven, watching while she lay unconscious and the mark spread. Those final moments in Haven, when she volunteered her life if it meant the safety of the people. Every battle, every confrontation she risked her life for his mistake. How could he ask more of her? He managed alone this far. He could endure a while longer.

"So, what’s an Inquisitor do when they retire anyway? Build a boat?"

"Well, word is she’s on some sorta pilgrimage."

"Makes sense. She’s the Herald of Andraste."

"Not for the Chantry. For…her gods. ‘Wants to find her gods’ is what the word says.”

"Oh, right. She’s one of them Dalish.” The way to speaker spat out the word summed up their feelings on the nomadic elves. From his shadows, Solas saw the speaker shake their head. “She’s the Herald of Andraste. She should be finding the Maker! Not some… heathen false gods.”

"Shouldn’t be surprising she put the elves before us. Hear what happened at the Winter Palace? An elf was declared Marquis ad given a position within court. And, apparently, a Dalish clan has taken up residence in a city further east and has taken over the council."

"It’s not right. What have elves done for us lately? They don’t deserve such commendations for doin’ nothing. Lazy bastards."

"Well, last I heard, the Herald was heading west from Skyhold. Maybe she’ll pass through here."

"Yeah? And if she does, we’ll set her straight. Forget those bloody demons of so-called gods and put them elves back in their place."

Solas left his place in the shadows, unwilling to hear more.

How quickly they turn on you, vhenan, he thought. Their lives are safe, their lands secured. They were willing to accept you as long as you were useful to them, but that usefulness is at an end. Now, you’re just another elf, grasping at what you do not deserve. Those who were closest to the conflict will remember longer but those in the further reaches of Thedas? Your deeds are just wild tales, grown with repeated telling. They do not believe in you as the rest do; as I do. 

He contemplated the rest of the conversation as he left the village. The Inquisitor had embarked on a pilgrimage? They had discovered several elven temples in their journeys, perhaps she planned to revisit them? The gossipers had mentioned she was traveling this direction, perhaps…

Solas found himself stopped once again as his mind reeled at the possibility. Headed this way? ‘Find her gods.’ She could not. No, it was not possible.

But how many times had he watched her achieve the impossible? The word seemed to hold no meaning for her.

Now, two emotions waged war as he resumed walking, mind racing.

The first emotion was dread. Did she figure it out? How much did she know? How many of his lies had she uncovered? He had wanted to be the one to tell her the truth. To have the chance to explain himself, if she would listen. He was afraid of how she would react to him. Would she hate him? Would she be hurt, look at him with those big eyes asking why, just as they had the night at the glen?

The second feeling, the worse feeling, was hope. Without the obligations of the Inquisition, she was free. Her actions were no longer directly bound to the organization. If she had discovered the truth, or at least enough that she was headed in the right direction, then perhaps together…

No. No. It could not be. He knew that when he changed the truth that night. He knew that when he left her. No matter how much it hurt, no matter what he wanted, this was his burden. It was his mistake, he will fix it. He will not drag her down with him.

He would head to the Tirashan tonight; try and put as much distance between them as possible. She must not find him, must not catch him

But what if she enters the Tirashan? She would not be able to find her way as he would. There was a reason the dense forest had been left alone for so long by humans and elves alike.

He would have to stop her. Wait for her, convince her to turn back. Give up on the gods, give up on… him. He would try and make her see reason. It was for the best.

It was not because he wanted to see her. Not at all. It was not because he wanted her to make him see reason. It was not so she could somehow convince him to let her help release the others. Definitely not so she could convince him to let her stay.

Solas rubs the bridge of his nose. He was getting too far ahead of himself. He does not truly know if this is her destination. The least he could do was wait a while. He knew of some ruins nearby where he could set up camp

The ruins were easy to find. Visible from the road, but far enough out that they were mostly left alone. He will wait there a while, see if she comes and when she does not he will continue onwards. After checking to make sure there were no additional inhabitants, he set his wards and began his wait.

He did not have to wait long.


End file.
